Si la pareja se muestra en exceso dependiente, hay que ayudarla a cuidar de sí misma y de su propia evolución, elevar su autoestima, fortalecer su personalidad. A la vez, cada uno debe preguntarse sobre si no está siendo demasiado directivo, si siempre quiere salirse con la suya, si le es difícil pactar acuerdos, si coarta las iniciativas del otro con excusas varias.
En su libro Solas, Carmen Alborch hace la siguiente reflexión:
“Cuidar una relación para que sobreviva resulta más fácil y probable cuando se ha cuidado la propia supervivencia y no se está esperando la salvación a través del amor romántico. En esta tarea han de trabajar ambos sexos que necesitan aprender cómo mantenerse en contacto con sus emociones y, también, descubrir cuáles son las exigencias de la seducción.”
Antes de iniciar una convivencia es oportuno, por tanto, preguntarse acerca de la propia independencia y de las propias capacidades. Se trata de elegir vivir en pareja porque va a resultar enriquecedor y confortable. No porque “necesito que alguien cuide de mi” ni porque “soy incapaz de estar solo”.
Este tipo de cuestiones se pueden tratar en una sesión de Terapia de Pareja.
Si necesitas cualquier tipo de asesoramiento y quieres conocer cómo se lleva a cabo una terapia puedes ponerte en contacto con nosotros en:
Centro de Orientación y Mediación Familiar COORDENADAS
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